06/09/21 PERSONAL TESTIMONY

06/09/21 PERSONAL TESTIMONY

Saved at three.
Childhood Walk, (3-12).
Double Minded Walk, (12-18).
Freshman at John Wesley Bible College (18) filled with Spirit, Walking in Spirit.

This is a brief overview of my Christian experience. Some folks question it. I don't, because I lived it and it is consistent with Biblical revelation.

I was asked if I considered myself a Christian when I was Double Minded. Here was my answer.

MY ANSWER
Yes sir. There are several factors, but the fact that I was double minded indicates that I was both spiritually minded and carnally minded at the same time.

I did have close and enlightening times with the Lord, but I also lived in and out of victory.
I still knew what it was to be in a right relationship with God, but also knew when I drifted or deliberately rebelled against the light I had and fell out of that right relationship.
I knew when I was moving away from God and I knew when I had disobeyed God.
It was not only a head knowledge but a heart awareness. I would come under conviction and seek God's forgiveness in repentance. I knew when I was I was living in and by faith.

I did not want to be this way, but I did not know that God had provided deliverance from the Double Mind.
In my case, my backsliding was sporadic, instead of a constant walk away from God.
God was so good to me.
Though my sins separated me from God's abiding presence, I sought Him quickly and He would restore me.

I never was good enough to be saved or restored.
I did not initiate those redemptive events in my life.
God called and forgave me when I turned to Him.
My short times of resistance and rebellion is nothing to brag about. It was still sin.
Sadly, great numbers of people slip or drift and then completely walk away, never to believe, repent again.

I knew about re-commitment and total surrender, but I did not know what was involved in total surrender until I heard about it at Bible college.
Hearing about heart purity did not cleanse me from the Double Mind, but I did realize that I wanted and needed to quit living in Romans chapter 7.
I needed and wanted to live in Romans chapter 8.

A definite work of God's cleansing and empowering grace took place.
My life became the consistent walk I wanted to live.
All of my praying, reading, obedience, growth did not deliver me, but it brought me to a place of surrender and trust.

I am not saying I never failed God again. I am saying that the life of constant inner battle of the New Man with the Old Man, was over.
On those occasions that I failed God, that I sinned, since 1965, God continued to deal with me and enabled me to return to Him.

Temptation is real, but because of His abiding presence I don't have the same carnal urges to stray, which I once had.
It is not that I got stronger by maturing, but He purified me with the fullness of His Holy Spirit, then maturing came also.

The temptations still come, but they come from without rather than within. As long as I walk in the Spirit and feed on the word of God, He continues to cleanse, empower and lead me.

This work of cleansing is accomplished by the Blood of Christ, the filling of the Holy Spirit and the power of God's word.

I know I gave more in the answer than you asked, but they were thoughts I wanted to share after I wrote the post. Thank you for asking.